who is this chic

 fun facts about me.

  • After two glasses of wine if you throw me in a cute outfit… you can’t tell me I’m not a celebrity.

  • I read 3 chapters of a book, then brag about it as if I’ve read the entire thing.

  • I just moved to Dallas.

  • First time a boy tried to kiss me was 3rd grade. He asked first. I ran away and called his mom to pick him up. (This happened.) Now I get ubers and call my own mom.

  • If you’re reading this still, we might have a shot at a future.

  • I eat 300 or 3,000 calories a day. Food consumption calculation is based on the following equation:

    • Square root of my emotional state, divided by the number of hours I’ve been watching TV, multiplied by how hungover I am.

  • I was once on a date with a guy who gave me weird vibes, so I Googled him in the bathroom. Turns out he had locked his ex-girlfriend in a basement, fired shotgun rounds outside his neighborhood, and ran from the cops. The S.W.A.T team had to intervene. Help me. #savejen

  • I eat popcorn, nuts, and sometimes cookies in bed. This will annoy you.

  • I’m allergic to cats, and most cat people.

  • I don’t really have social media. I just started an Instagram so I can stalk potential applicants, and send my friends memes they’ve already seen.

  • My phone is on DND 100% of the time. Oh you have “read” receipts? Well I don’t even have notifications on. #win

  • I don’t correct auto corrects, even when they screw up my grammar. So if you’re the grammar police, and this annoys you, we will not be a fit. You’re probably the same guy who’s story is always better than everyone else’s and nobody wants to hang out with you anyway.

  • Being single is fun, but have you ever got to run around the world with your best friend laughing hysterically? Heard that’s a thing.

stats.

  • 5’4

  • 135-145lbs depending on time of year

  • Size 6, or 8 see above.

  • No kids.

  • Live in Dallas.